How can sex toys help long-distance relationships

When you are in a long-distance relationship or living apart from your partner this can be difficult because you are missing out on that all-important physical relationship and intimacy: cuddling on the couch, holding hands, kissing and of course, having sex. But it is normal to desire intimacy with your partner when you are apart, but maintaining that intimacy and keeping things spicy sometimes is not that easy. Luckily, thanks to technology and sex toys, physical distance doesn’t have to affect your sex life. So, if you are not near each other, for any reason, rest assured there are ways to remain close. Keep on reading to find out how. 

One challenge is maintaining your sex life when you are apart from your partner. This type of relationship can be more challenging because you don’t have the benefit of being side by side but that doesn’t have to be detrimental to your bond as a couple; in fact, it might even make it stronger because you have to work extra hard to stay connected.

Keeping some kind of sexual connection is necessary for these two particular reasons:
1. To keep the romantic side of your relationship alive while separated. 
2. To provide needed stress relief to help with the difficulties that can occur during physical separation.

So, don’t let distance get in the way of your sex life. Here are some tips and tricks to try if you want to keep the sparkle alive in your relationship, even though you’re apart.

1. Use app-controlled sex toys

Luckily for couples in a long-distance relationship, you don’t have to be in the same place to sexually stimulate and pleasure each other. Through app controlled or teledildonic toys, you can accomplish this even if you have miles in between you and your partner. The Happy Willy Company has a variety for app sex toys both for him and for her. For him, you can choose from the Lelo app-controlled male masturbator and for her SVAKOM love egg that also connects to an app and you can let your partner be in charge of the setting of the sex toy. Or you can go one step further with the We-Vibe’s Sync and allows you and your partner video chat, so you can take your smart sex experience to the next level. 

2. Leave Behind Sexy Surprises When You Visit

Why not surprise and catch your partner off guard by leaving some sexy underwear, some sex toy or a dirty love note at their place as you depart. That way, they will be able to appreciate your present and enjoy your company even in your absence.

3. Couples’ App

You can use apps like We Did ItCouple and Happy Couple this can help you and your partner stay connected and get to know each other long-distance, and some apps can help keep the spark alive the Desire (which is R-rated).  InTheMood is another great app for couples who want to flirt and communicate their desires. One benefit of utilising this type of app, over the usual texting or communication channels, is that you will find that you are more playful and at ease. If you use a separate app to chat about your passions and desires, as opposed mixing practical with naughty messages. (1)

4. Write Your Own Erotica

Rather than searching on erotica websites for masturbation material, why not create your own that both of you can experience and enjoy. Why not tell them what you would do to them with the sex toy if you were with them. It might even inspire you for when you are back together and try new things. 

5.Have a video call

These days it is very easy to do a video call any time you want. It might feel a bit awkward at first, but you will soon find your feet and like many other people you will be able to find ways to make a long-distance sexual activity work over video.
Enjoy a mutual masturbation session as it has lots of benefits, like teaching each other what you like and enjoying sexual intimacy. One thing that might help if you are feeling shy is to turn off the lights, or at the beginning of the call angling the camera away from you. Or, if you dislike the concept of doing anything too sexy in front of the camera, you look into each other’s eyes whilst you pleasure yourselves. You can choose to either describe to your partner what you would do to them or what you are doing to yourself. Or tell them what you love about your partner beyond their sexy parts. And, of course, you don’t need to focus just on the sex. You need to remember that emotional connection is an essential part of strong sex life. Or just look at your partner in silence, find that place in their eyes that feels regular and brings the two of you to that comfort zone.

6. Try Good, Old-Fashioned Phone Sex

Why not start by giving each other a call and then see if it turns into phone sex. It might seem basic or turning back the clock to 1990, but it’s possible to get aroused using only your voices. The sound of your partner’s voice can be a turn-on and when you think about it is often missing from everyday sexting. This should help you feel closer because it can help you appreciate your partner for their words rather than physical traits.

7. Have A Sexy Conversation

One benefit in being in a long-distance is that it can give you the opportunity to talk about sex in a way that you might be embarrassed or shy to discuss in person. Use this to your advantage by discussing fantasies, how your sex life is going thus far, and if you would like to try anything new.
You may desire to send a few steamy photos via email or text, as a form of foreplay and teasing for real-life activities to come. We advise to ensure that the picture is not anything too revealing (leave your face out of the photos, for instance) but show each other just enough to pique your interest.
You could even pop other surprises into the actual mail, including sultry gifts like a sex toy for one another. This will give you a better understanding if your partner would be OK with receiving a kinky gift and promise to use it when you reunited.

8. Get To Know Each Other’s Bodies

Get to understand each other’s bodies intimately by purposefully taking time to explore while on a video call, this experience can be a huge turn-on. Then once the call is over, you can fantasise about their body and it will be something to look forward to touching once you meet again. 

9.Have Meaningful Conversations

While sexy conversations can be meaningful, don’t neglect to have discussions about your fears, hopes, dreams and disappointments, too. Being vulnerable with someone can lead to more satisfying physical intimacy.

10.Slip Into Lingerie

It is important to feel sexy even though you aren’t physically there to see each other, that is why wearing the finest lingerie can help with this. You could even wear lingerie you may not otherwise feel comfortable wearing when you are with your partner. Next step, try masturbating at the same time or experiment with brainstorming new ideas for sexual fantasies, like talking dirty, using sex talks, etc.

Now that you know what to do when you are apart, you can also use the time spent apart to plan what you’d like to do once you can meet up again. 

(1) (source: Bustle (2020), authored by Suzannah Weiss and Carolyn Steber, 15 Ways To Maintain Your Sex Life In A Long-Distance Relationship [accessed May 2020])